Author: Veli Ndaba
“How you see yourself determines what you see for yourself, Are You Externally or Internally Driven?.” Veli Ndaba – ‘The NeuroEngineer’ Self-esteem represents an overall evaluation of oneself – the extent to which one feels positively rather than negatively toward oneself – and views oneself as a person of value and worth. Contingent self-esteem is […]
“How you see yourself determines what you see for yourself, Are You Externally or Internally Driven?.” Veli Ndaba – ‘The NeuroEngineer’
Self-esteem represents an overall evaluation of oneself – the extent to which one feels positively rather than negatively toward oneself – and views oneself as a person of value and worth. Contingent self-esteem is self-esteem that depends on meeting self-imposed standards or expectations for performance, approval, or acceptance in order to be maintained. Contingent means: dependent, conditional, subject to, based on, determined by.
Contingent self-esteem (CSE) is self-esteem based on the approval of others or on social comparisons. Certain events will shape one’s self-esteem when the individual bases their self-worth on the outcome of those events. The success or failure of any situation can result in fluctuations of an individual’s self-esteem and if they are Externally or Internally Driven.
A manifestation of someone with contingent self-esteem is excessive self-consciousness. Such excessive self-consciousness, as occurs with contingent self-esteem, involves extreme criticism of one’s self, concern of how they are perceived by their peers, and feelings of discomfort in social settings. One’s self-esteem is directly affected when domains of contingencies are used to measure one’s self-worth. Self-esteem can also be affected when an individual compares their appearance or success to that of someone else or when their self-esteem is contingent to the relationships around them.
People with high levels of CSE are prone to making social comparisons based on appearance. As a result, these individuals more than often feel diminished. Appearance related social comparisons are comparisons of one’s perceived appearance to the appearance of other people. Those who make social comparisons base their feelings of self-worth on meeting social standards and expectations.
Social media is notorious for creating unrealistic standards of beauty, success and happiness. Comparisons with media standards can cause an individual with high levels of CSE to acquire feelings of inadequacy.
Veli Ndaba is a NeuroEngineering Leadership Effect Speaker and Trainer, Brain Coach and Author of four books (You Are Born to Win, Your Dream is Calling You and SWITCH ON! And Set Your Soul On Fire!) and Newspaper Columnist. To book him to speak at your next event or to help you and your team unleash your greatness, Are You Externally or Internally Driven?
Contact Us at WeSpeak Global and follow us on Twitter
The articles, video and images embedded on these pages are from various speakers and talent.
These remain the property of its owner and are not affiliated with or endorsed by WeSpeak Global.
Most people experience discomfort and they run. Hunting Discomfort may be the experience of pain (and that’s… unpleasant), but on the other side of that pain are breakthrough results. If you’re committed to breakthrough results, hunting discomfort will get you there, even to give a TED Talk. Everyone knows that giving a TED Talk is […]
On a recent flight, at almost every stop along the way, the airline I had chosen reminded me that I was flying with “the best” So can you over-compliment your CX. Airport signage told me…the CEO appearing on the pre-flight safety video told me…the flight attendant announcements told me…well, you get the picture. The problem […]
Getting absolutely clear about HOW TO UNCOVER YOUR PASSION is critical to your success as an entrepreneur. You want a passion that you are willing to shout from the rooftops—that you’ll share with everyone, even strangers at a cocktail party. Why is identifying your unique passion so important? Because passion is fundamental to your forward progress. […]
In his new book, “Can’t Hurt Me,” David Goggins, who many call the “toughest man alive,” recalls how he overcame a difficult childhood to become a Navy SEAL. He sits down with Craig Melvin to discuss the lessons he learned about the body’s capabilities. READ FULL ARTICLE Contact Us at WeSpeak Global and […]
Care About and Challenge Each Other – The Two Keys to Team Performance I’ve been a part of lots of teams, in sports and business, and over the past 20 years I’ve had a chance to work with many high-performing teams, at companies like Google, Wells Fargo, Microsoft, Schwab, eBay, and others. I’ve also studied […]
I first met Julie Faupel during a week-long personal growth retreat and learnt how to get Closer to Your Customer. The retreat required a total digital detox and abstinence of any conversation related to career, work or business. Julie and I became fast friends and for me personally, the retreat experience was transformational. Fortunately, the […]
Excited to share the big news that I’ve been talking with many of you about already! The Launch You’ve Been Waiting For. How to Get Results #NoMatterWhat, It turns out there’s actually proven science around how to get results #NoMatterWhat. It’s all too clear that this is still a really tough time for many people […]
Master Your Mind will expand your sphere of influence and drastically increase your confidence. The executive coaching services and leadership training offered here empower leaders to engage their teams by empowering themselves first. James R. Elliot is a board-designated and certified leadership coach offering training and coaching services to leaders who: Need to discuss personal […]
Our Mission
© All rights reserved 2025. Created using VOXEL THEME
