Author: Veli Ndaba
“How you see yourself determines what you see for yourself, Are You Externally or Internally Driven?.” Veli Ndaba – ‘The NeuroEngineer’ Self-esteem represents an overall evaluation of oneself – the extent to which one feels positively rather than negatively toward oneself – and views oneself as a person of value and worth. Contingent self-esteem is […]
“How you see yourself determines what you see for yourself, Are You Externally or Internally Driven?.” Veli Ndaba – ‘The NeuroEngineer’
Self-esteem represents an overall evaluation of oneself – the extent to which one feels positively rather than negatively toward oneself – and views oneself as a person of value and worth. Contingent self-esteem is self-esteem that depends on meeting self-imposed standards or expectations for performance, approval, or acceptance in order to be maintained. Contingent means: dependent, conditional, subject to, based on, determined by.
Contingent self-esteem (CSE) is self-esteem based on the approval of others or on social comparisons. Certain events will shape one’s self-esteem when the individual bases their self-worth on the outcome of those events. The success or failure of any situation can result in fluctuations of an individual’s self-esteem and if they are Externally or Internally Driven.
A manifestation of someone with contingent self-esteem is excessive self-consciousness. Such excessive self-consciousness, as occurs with contingent self-esteem, involves extreme criticism of one’s self, concern of how they are perceived by their peers, and feelings of discomfort in social settings. One’s self-esteem is directly affected when domains of contingencies are used to measure one’s self-worth. Self-esteem can also be affected when an individual compares their appearance or success to that of someone else or when their self-esteem is contingent to the relationships around them.
People with high levels of CSE are prone to making social comparisons based on appearance. As a result, these individuals more than often feel diminished. Appearance related social comparisons are comparisons of one’s perceived appearance to the appearance of other people. Those who make social comparisons base their feelings of self-worth on meeting social standards and expectations.
Social media is notorious for creating unrealistic standards of beauty, success and happiness. Comparisons with media standards can cause an individual with high levels of CSE to acquire feelings of inadequacy.
Veli Ndaba is a NeuroEngineering Leadership Effect Speaker and Trainer, Brain Coach and Author of four books (You Are Born to Win, Your Dream is Calling You and SWITCH ON! And Set Your Soul On Fire!) and Newspaper Columnist. To book him to speak at your next event or to help you and your team unleash your greatness, Are You Externally or Internally Driven?
Contact Us at WeSpeak Global and follow us on Twitter
The articles, video and images embedded on these pages are from various speakers and talent.
These remain the property of its owner and are not affiliated with or endorsed by WeSpeak Global.
We’re 60 days out from a new year and a new year and 10 things to do in the next 30 days ensure 2023 is your most EPIC year yet. I don’t know about you but I plan on making 2023 a year of EPIC achievement, EPIC health and EPIC experiences. Having an EPIC […]
3 Ways to Tap into Emotion During a Pitch and The power of emotion is something that has a universal appeal and can breathe life into simple cold facts. Have you ever pitched something you knew was great, only to have it shot down? Of course you have. We all have. And though the rejection […]
11 days ago was the last time I have been outside and even had the privilege to go for a car ride which gave me the promise of perspective. I had just returned home from the hospital, hopped up on all kinds of meds my body has never felt before, never been through surgery in […]
The risks of Algorithmic Inequality Trap and discrimination and bias have received much attention and scrutiny, and rightly so. Yet there is another more insidious side-effect of our increasingly AI-powered society — the systematic inequality created by the changing nature of work itself. We fear a future where robots take our jobs, but what happens […]
If you’ve ever launched something as 3-2-1 Liftoff!, whether it is a basketball shot, a new business, or the 2 Liter bottle rocket for your kid’s science project, you know the arc of senses one feels in each attempt to succeed as we let go of our security and send the object into motion to […]
Build your leadership confidence with these 7 Ways to Be a More Confident Leader instantly-actionable tips from leadership keynote speaker and relatability expert Rachel DeAlto. In leadership, healthy confidence is key. Your team is looking to you for guidance, security, and support. But what if self-doubt is crowding out that inner boldness? First of […]
A common problem new pilots struggle with is avoiding a PIO or pilot-induced oscillation. So how do we Stop the Cycle as We’re all familiar with the concept of overcorrecting in a car. A deer runs out, you’re driving tired, you’re near the edge of the road, and you yank the wheel the other direction […]
Connection with someone takes more than common interests of What Makes People Click. It also takes this. Do you know who created the world’s first social network? It wasn’t Zuckerberg, Dorsey, or Tom from MySpace. It was the person who kindled the first fire. The fire’s loud crackling, billowing smoke, and beautiful orange glow attracted others […]
Our Mission
© All rights reserved 2025. Created using VOXEL THEME
