Author: Veli Ndaba
“How you see yourself determines what you see for yourself, Are You Externally or Internally Driven?.” Veli Ndaba – ‘The NeuroEngineer’ Self-esteem represents an overall evaluation of oneself – the extent to which one feels positively rather than negatively toward oneself – and views oneself as a person of value and worth. Contingent self-esteem is […]
“How you see yourself determines what you see for yourself, Are You Externally or Internally Driven?.” Veli Ndaba – ‘The NeuroEngineer’
Self-esteem represents an overall evaluation of oneself – the extent to which one feels positively rather than negatively toward oneself – and views oneself as a person of value and worth. Contingent self-esteem is self-esteem that depends on meeting self-imposed standards or expectations for performance, approval, or acceptance in order to be maintained. Contingent means: dependent, conditional, subject to, based on, determined by.
Contingent self-esteem (CSE) is self-esteem based on the approval of others or on social comparisons. Certain events will shape one’s self-esteem when the individual bases their self-worth on the outcome of those events. The success or failure of any situation can result in fluctuations of an individual’s self-esteem and if they are Externally or Internally Driven.
A manifestation of someone with contingent self-esteem is excessive self-consciousness. Such excessive self-consciousness, as occurs with contingent self-esteem, involves extreme criticism of one’s self, concern of how they are perceived by their peers, and feelings of discomfort in social settings. One’s self-esteem is directly affected when domains of contingencies are used to measure one’s self-worth. Self-esteem can also be affected when an individual compares their appearance or success to that of someone else or when their self-esteem is contingent to the relationships around them.
People with high levels of CSE are prone to making social comparisons based on appearance. As a result, these individuals more than often feel diminished. Appearance related social comparisons are comparisons of one’s perceived appearance to the appearance of other people. Those who make social comparisons base their feelings of self-worth on meeting social standards and expectations.
Social media is notorious for creating unrealistic standards of beauty, success and happiness. Comparisons with media standards can cause an individual with high levels of CSE to acquire feelings of inadequacy.
Veli Ndaba is a NeuroEngineering Leadership Effect Speaker and Trainer, Brain Coach and Author of four books (You Are Born to Win, Your Dream is Calling You and SWITCH ON! And Set Your Soul On Fire!) and Newspaper Columnist. To book him to speak at your next event or to help you and your team unleash your greatness, Are You Externally or Internally Driven?
Contact Us at WeSpeak Global and follow us on Twitter
The articles, video and images embedded on these pages are from various speakers and talent.
These remain the property of its owner and are not affiliated with or endorsed by WeSpeak Global.
Few months ago, I was supposed to go somewhere with someone and realized What Drives You. We’d agreed to meet at a particular spot but I was trying to renegotiate our meeting place so I can avoid having to take multiple local taxies. And so this person exclaim in total shock…and said, “Nicky, you mean […]
Unveiling the Secrets of Successful Keynote Speaker Booking: Insights from a Meeting Planner To learn more about booking a keynote speaker tailored to your event’s specific needs, please don’t hesitate to contact us. Our experienced team is ready to provide expert guidance and help make your next event an unforgettable success. A Meeting Planner’s Perspective […]
It is All about perspective as I type this, I am in Jeffreys Bay in a Motorhome overlooking the ocean with my woman after traveling over 1000kms through the country and I am in awe of the things that I’ve been able to witness. Driving through the small towns that literally span not more than […]
As I pulled into the gas station in a remote part of southeastern Utah, I was thankful to finally find cell reception to prepare for Watching Yourself. Tethering my phone’s hotspot to my laptop, I hurriedly logged onto the webinar where I was my pre-recorded presentation for a client in Texas, engaging in realtime on […]
11 WAYS TO LIVE with a New year. New goals. New opportunities. #NOMATTERWHAT IN 2022 Welcome to 2022. 11 WAYS TO LIVE #NOMATTERWHAT IN 2022 What separates the high-achievers that actually reach what they strive for from those that don’t? Even in the face of assuredly new challenges, limits and obstacles… I’ll tell you – […]
Something about being Attracted to the PAST seems much more romantic than the future so Are you more attracted to the PAST or the FUTURE?. Maybe it’s because the past is a time we can look back on with nostalgia, or perhaps it’s because the future is an unknown quantity. Whatever the reason, it seems […]
There’s one thing between you and the results you want – Discover what discomfort is stopping you to be it a higher functioning team, more leadership, more money or just more joy and happiness – you know what it is? That’s right, discomfort. If you’ve read anything about the upcoming book (or listened to me, […]
I think we often need a reminder of our home and our Earth Day. We have a 24-hour day based on the rotation of our planet relative to the sun. But it is much more personal than that. The day is also based on our daily perspectives and ways of viewing the day. The world […]
Our Mission
© All rights reserved 2025. Created using VOXEL THEME
